MAHIWAGANG BENTE PESOS

The culture of being jeepney passengers include that when you are sitting farther from the jeepney driver seat, you will have to make your payment (unless you are lastikman) by asking the person sitting ahead of you to pass it forward, which as if programmed already to our DNA, comes about automatically most of the time. Now I’ve had my awkward moments on the jeepney-ride-experience. From falling asleep with my mouth wide open to irrelevantly loudly announcing the change of another passenger as I handed it to them “CHANGE NIYO PO, 5 PESOS PO” because I was at that time zombish-exhausted, coming off from work during my very short cashier stint (where it is preferred that you announce the amount of cash you receive and hand out to customers) in a fast food chain store way back when I was younger.

The other day, the experience just got another addition. I was with a friend, who sat across where I was and we were chatting. This lady behind me said “bayad po” so my commuter-instinct came on and I turned to reach for her money so that I can pass it to the driver when to our surprise she quickly held it back close to her chest with both hands clasped on the 20 peso bill as if it was a 2 million cash cheque. I swear I saw a little panic in her eyes.

I reacted quite amused, We sort of laughed (Lyle and I)and I just had to ask her “ Ayaw mo?” while still extending my hand for her 20 peso bill. “Lyle ayaaaw???” I rethorically asked my friend. The seemingly paranoid lady eventually let go of the pseudo-2 million paper money which I immediately pocketed hahaha, deh joke, I passed it to the driver shempre. I don’t know if she thought hoodlum ako but I thought she looked more like the part. Haha Im just being mean. Sorry. It just didn’t feel nice to be mistaken as a 20-peso-bill-snatching-student-nurse (am I that obvious, hehe joke!), but then again it was definitely funny at that moment.

I remember that time when I slept over at a friend’s house (kareen’s) and I woke up almost late for school (CSB days), I was really hurrying and just hopped on to a jeep when this other girl my age kept staring at me, suspiciously staring, and definitely disturbingly staring. Finally I coldly asked her “ Ano?” to which she informed me that I had my shirt inside-out. Ngak.

Or how about that time, when this long haired lice-full of head sat in front of me and I kept trying to stay cautious of her hair strands from touching my face. And praying her lice maintain very strong grips until I get off the ride.

Jeepney rides. And you thought you could just get into one and get off at your destination that simple each time. You think the only thing you get to leave when you get off with is the smell of jeepney fumes overpowering the scent of your shampoo and cologne, you think you can inhale too much CFC’s, take too much traffic, the rubbing of the legs (hay), the cramming inside, the loud disco music, the knee-bend walk inside, the blank staring, etc.

Short stories happen here, the little tv-commercials of our lives, and Im glad they came along.

PS: For real transportation goons of 20-peso bills and above,please magbagong buhay na kayo, you traumatize, terrorize and you are wasting your character away.  Para naman sa mga commuters, you could be me, mukhang goon pero hindeh, joke! assess with taste naman jan kasi. Hahaha.