"am not perfect nor close to it.. i have also mistakes that made me this shattered and crushed again.. i did try to conceal my imperfections..try to patch the holes but i was too late to patch things up.. it was too late..and it hurts so bad that it really kills me inside.. i tried to save it..but it was really too late.. my heart is broken.. it is shattered and and the agony will continue..i dont know how long..it hurts so bad that u easily moved on..it feels like hell.. the thought.. you are gone and out of my life..seeing you will kill me more but somehow in some ways it will make me strong..maybe not now but in time.. i know everything will be fine.. but for now i want to tell u for the last time.. i love you and each waking up knowing your gone really feels like hell..."~~~anoynymous-by choice-friend.
While the rest of us embraced the New Year with big hugs, someone i know is hugging on to love lost. Love...it is really something exclusive. The whole of each is only conceivable by the very people involve. I mean, we've all been there, friends telling you he's not worth it.., he is panget after all,that there are better loves somewhere out there,they keep asking you what you see in the guy... but still we listen only to our hearts and answer only to what we feel. It is exclusive alright. In some cases, i even think love makes us stupid. (if you've never been there, dont bother reading this blog, it might contaminate your blissful idea of love or make me sound simply pessimistic -which im not trying to be, by the way. ;)- it is complicated to those who are virgins to subjective similar situations.)Anyway, I placed a bet of 300 pesos that my broken-hearted-friend-blog-above will re-unite with dear-lost-beloved or that dear-lost-beloved will at least attempt to get back with her within 3 months. I dont hope i win though, I mean the guy is okay but personally i have a hunch he's not the one ( will not disclose my reasons in respect to both parties) and like i say in mind...'if you are not the one, dont waste time''. But then again, whatever is the outcome, as long as my friend's happy and sane , I'll be here and trust she knows what she's doing (Kaya mo yan! Repeat after me: "Pag Ibig Ka Lang!" mwahaha ;p.Hell. Ive been here (not exactly the same pero yung feeling ng despair in love i mean). God knows I've walked on hot coals and broken pieces of glass for love. Did it stop me? No. But true enough that in the sad end, real sore heartbreaks can make you cry like the Pagsanjan Falls,stay sleepless for nights, all the while feeling a gong just beneath your chest being hit over and over again. It almost seem like the pain will never ever stop. It almost seem like every little thing reminds you of that person you wish your heart can forget or if not the person at least the feelings. Its insane. Ganyan talaga ang life. Buti na lang, there will always be a rainbow after the rain, the leprechaun's pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and a leprechaun chasing after you ;p sorry sinusumpong na naman ako ng kalokahan ;p corny mo suno. Seriously,ultimately naman the heart is destined to come out wiser with a more cautious but deeper love naman on the positive side (as supposed to be). And plus! Its time to beautify (->even more). :) or sulk a few days (give yourself a deadline on the sulking though) Chippy lang katapat nyan, pancit canton, ice cream, salon, spa and popcorn na rin. :) hahaha pinapataba lang kita ;) As for cruellas that surround you, dont mind them, now that you're singlish ;p they better hold on to their bf's. (naks ang hangin mo..ehehe). In time...Mr. Right will come around and love is just bound to happen. :)
Ahh.We talked on the phone last night for hours and i listened to her endless expressions of her suddenly-poetic broken heart. (Wow 'Lugmo' ang lalim...'dalamhati' etc, just goes to prove how desperately we try to define not the word 'pain' but the feeling of pain...) I think she'll be fine though,come worst- that her love has found someone else. Because if she wont be fine, why the hell are we friends for? Didnt we learn anything from each other. Naks! hoy 300 pesos ko! I keep talking here like Im Ms. Jane de Mango. Im no love expert/therapist. Just your friendly support who is willing to listen to your mindless drama-joke!. hehe:) and maybe tease you a little bit. "Pag Ibig Ka Lang!" hahaha ;P.
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