MAHIWAGANG BENTE PESOS

The culture of being jeepney passengers include that when you are sitting farther from the jeepney driver seat, you will have to make your payment (unless you are lastikman) by asking the person sitting ahead of you to pass it forward, which as if programmed already to our DNA, comes about automatically most of the time. Now I’ve had my awkward moments on the jeepney-ride-experience. From falling asleep with my mouth wide open to irrelevantly loudly announcing the change of another passenger as I handed it to them “CHANGE NIYO PO, 5 PESOS PO” because I was at that time zombish-exhausted, coming off from work during my very short cashier stint (where it is preferred that you announce the amount of cash you receive and hand out to customers) in a fast food chain store way back when I was younger.

The other day, the experience just got another addition. I was with a friend, who sat across where I was and we were chatting. This lady behind me said “bayad po” so my commuter-instinct came on and I turned to reach for her money so that I can pass it to the driver when to our surprise she quickly held it back close to her chest with both hands clasped on the 20 peso bill as if it was a 2 million cash cheque. I swear I saw a little panic in her eyes.

I reacted quite amused, We sort of laughed (Lyle and I)and I just had to ask her “ Ayaw mo?” while still extending my hand for her 20 peso bill. “Lyle ayaaaw???” I rethorically asked my friend. The seemingly paranoid lady eventually let go of the pseudo-2 million paper money which I immediately pocketed hahaha, deh joke, I passed it to the driver shempre. I don’t know if she thought hoodlum ako but I thought she looked more like the part. Haha Im just being mean. Sorry. It just didn’t feel nice to be mistaken as a 20-peso-bill-snatching-student-nurse (am I that obvious, hehe joke!), but then again it was definitely funny at that moment.

I remember that time when I slept over at a friend’s house (kareen’s) and I woke up almost late for school (CSB days), I was really hurrying and just hopped on to a jeep when this other girl my age kept staring at me, suspiciously staring, and definitely disturbingly staring. Finally I coldly asked her “ Ano?” to which she informed me that I had my shirt inside-out. Ngak.

Or how about that time, when this long haired lice-full of head sat in front of me and I kept trying to stay cautious of her hair strands from touching my face. And praying her lice maintain very strong grips until I get off the ride.

Jeepney rides. And you thought you could just get into one and get off at your destination that simple each time. You think the only thing you get to leave when you get off with is the smell of jeepney fumes overpowering the scent of your shampoo and cologne, you think you can inhale too much CFC’s, take too much traffic, the rubbing of the legs (hay), the cramming inside, the loud disco music, the knee-bend walk inside, the blank staring, etc.

Short stories happen here, the little tv-commercials of our lives, and Im glad they came along.

PS: For real transportation goons of 20-peso bills and above,please magbagong buhay na kayo, you traumatize, terrorize and you are wasting your character away.  Para naman sa mga commuters, you could be me, mukhang goon pero hindeh, joke! assess with taste naman jan kasi. Hahaha.

Balatan

No More Glutathione questions please. The answer is No. It is still entirely & definitely humbly DNA heritage. And certainly, it’s not all rainbows; there are also rains to being this white (and I’m not even the whitest of them all, this recognition- if there is actually any- is probably for Snowhite alone)chaka promise hindi ako siguro super puti. Anyway as for the rains.., so far the latest is being falsely doubted artificial too many times in a day by random people.tsk tsk tsk.

Example:
Girl: Anung Glutha pills ang tinetake mo?
Me: Ah hindeh wala
Girl: Original yan?
Me: Ah sa mommy ko toh namana
Girl: Owws, hindi ka nag pa bleach?
Me: hindeh
Girl: Ah talaga ha.


Iba when people keep assuming if you were dermatologically enhanced kung hindi naman.

It can be uhm...a little mildly exasperating (even if one meant well).
Hindi nga patas eh, can I go up to people and ask them “uy anu tine-take mo? Uling?” o di ba hindeh. Hay.

It is somewhat the same as going up to someone with a really pricey original designer’s bag worth half the value of your house and asking the person “ Class A ba yan or Class B sa greenhills mo binili?”. Now you have an idea. So just be gentle with the assumptions because chances are, not everyone is up to chasing casper's transparency.

I mean it’s not like I haven’t heard the ‘naliligo ka sa gatas’-joke too many times. These are okay. I remember nung high school (Music. Pasok. Sharon Cuneta: “high school life oh my high school life how exciting kay saya...") some of my classmates, when they walk pass me on my seat they will stretch out their wrist to near my lips, telling me if I needed blood, I could suck blood from it. Haha mga kolokoy. Labanos. Anak Araw. White lady. Glow in the Dark. I think I’ve heard it all. Actually I’ve just about heard it all pala yesterday lang. During our health teaching in the community:

Tao 1: Naliligo ata sa gatas yan eh
Tao 2: Hindi sa gatas. Mukhang binuhusan ng Boysen

Bago yun ah. Boysen.

The skin is the naked shirt of our beauty. So Hubaran na toh. Joke. Pang pagulo lang ;) hehe
Deh but it is.
We will not always be flawless, but we will always be beautiful (anu man ang kulay natin)
Kung may lait ang itim, may pintas din ang puti.
Because the world is not perfect
But it is fair after all.

Bad Things Happen~Wag Pasaway~

The car flew and tumbled, while the screams coming from it halted as it stopped.. knocked over.

My cousin met an accident last night around 1 am while driving the colossal fire truck of their station (he’s been a fire volunteer ever since man discovered fire ~that long). Their team was responding to a fire in Cubao QC. The Collision sent the intersecting vehicle whose body is similar to the old Tamaraw FX type (I forgot the name of the exact model), soaring and doing a 360 tumble twice. In it were 5 people, the driver being an old man of around 70 yrs old and the youngest passenger being only 12. The vehicle attempted to race past in between the two fire trucks but actually got smashed by the second truck (the one my cousin was driving). Hearing the story is already enough for me to picture out the brutal scene that took place. It was, as admitted by both sides… an unfortunate accident. The injured parties are still at the hospital and my cousin along with his team hasn’t slept a wink. They were at the hospital all night and just came home to get some things and they are now back at the hospital again.

Anak ng Tinae! (ipot) Please be mindful when you are driving, especially when you have passengers with you. Do not disregard siren alarms (although minsan abuso ang ibang may wang-wang, just check first and judge on the visuals before you opt to disregard if ever) and not be oblivious to a social situation. Do not race with threatening vehicles just to save a few minutes of time, instead save yourself a few more minutes of life. There is no winner in circumstances like this, both parties are burdened except kung halang ang kaluluwa mo and Ulul ka lang talaga. There goes the Ulol again. Sorry.

When I was younger I didn’t care much for accidents. They were only pictures of tragic adventures in my mind, and a predicament that can happen to anybody except to me or to people I know. It was all too unreal to take seriously but as life goes by ,these once unfamiliar misfortunes will come knocking at your fate, and you start realizing that bad things do happen and it can happen to you. And while we can believe that all things are destined and even argue that there is no such thing as an accident in this world, it wouldn’t hurt to take a little caution every now and then, and value the worth you give to your life.

Kubrador at Cobrabird

...hindi ako takot sa ahas.


"May kukubrahin pa ko sa katapusan" keso "kubra" dito "kubra" doon. What an infuriating term. Kubra. Kubra. Kubra. Is there no other more acceptable term like "Kunin" "Kikitain" ? So after many "kubras" hindi ko na natiis so i asked an equally maddening question "'Kubra' ka ng 'Kubra' jan!, Ahas ka? Cobra ka ba?" so I cupped one of my hands to imitate a snake's form (a cobra's, to be specific.)and then nag batang-isip mode :

Che: "SSSssshhhhh....SsssssSSshhh.."

Ryan: "Ah..anong ginagawa mo?"

Then I jabbed him on his right arm using my ala-snake formed right hand.) Yes. seriously i did -ala bruce lee style, that is if you know the bruce lee moves. ;p

"kubra-kubra-kubrahin kita jan e"

Eh cute ako (feelingera ;p), kaya natawa naman siya ;p hahaha and shempre nauna na akong tumatawa haha.

(Ang kulit ko noh.., pag mature ka na ba.. dapat di ka na makulit? ..not to worry I am at other instances and situations, sophisticated and responsible naman... but as for other times (like this)... I vow to be more mature and to act more matured, to leave all my corny jokes behind and all my badong hirits and all my silly stunts when i reach the age of...... 85. ) Congrats! So If you die before me, It'll be like a good thing, but if i die before you, you'll miss me. ;)
Plus anyway, i haven't heard the word 'kubra' since....hmm. Effective?

Actually I have had past experiences with the phonetically-alike word 'cobra' also:

CSB days. Lianes and I were talking in Class then, about men (yes you talk about us , we talk about you ) and other thingssss. When we got hold of the class attendance sheet or something like that which has everyone's id number and email address on it. There was one very distracting email address of a certain classmate that really got us laughing, panu ba naman COBRABIRD_*******@yahoo.com, so we looked around in class for who could be potentially this egoistic to create such an email add to see if he looks like he does live up to his email add. Bintang dito Bintang doon pa kami, all the while joking that this cobrabird guy is DaNgErOus, keso nanunuklaw yun ,makamandag, mamatay ka pag ginawa niyo kase venomous...etc. ;p Lianes is so equally kalog pa naman. Super laugh trip. Yun pala this Cobrabird guy is the one sitting just right infront of us. Ang lakas lakas pa ng boses namin and we were really snickering wildly the whole time. Nakakaloka, He just sat there listening to us as we pulled all sort of stupid jokes about his email...ang sama sama namin---awkward. We're really sorry cobrabird. But Nope, he did not look like an owner of a cobra bird, only a cobrabird email. ;p I bet nagpalit na siya ng email add ngayon. (just to clarify...Lianes and I, we're good girls...nagkataon lang natawa kami. bawal???!)

Note: If you know the guy, wag niyo na ako isumbong. ;p Nagbago na ako. naniniwala na akong posibleng may cobrabird sa mundo. wahahaha. joke. huling hirit na yan promise. ;p

Cash and Charge

...it to experience.

So we think we got problems? Cheers to Manong Pabundol of the Pabangga Gang. (ok so I invented the a.k.a only so we could identify better) Scums whose daily job is to wait and randomly pick a car to get hit by. Matindi na talaga ang pangangailangan niya. Its a pity to know people are this desperate, but im honestly not too sympathetic right now. P.I ka Manong, Papatayin mo ba ako sa nerbyos? Ikaw ang highlight ng araw ko kahapon.

We were on our way home to Manila,pero along Makati pa kami. This happened last night. Medyo traffic and sa may bandang pa stoplight na so mabagal na super yung takbo namin. And This old guy jumped out of the darkness from the center island, walked infront of us then all of a sudden he ran towards the passenger side of the car and hit the side mirror and then bumale-balentong pa tumbling tumbling sa kalsada then bumulagta sa middle of the road pero sa likod ng sasakyan namin and he made it looked like binundol namin siya. And I was so shocked nalaglag ko lahat ng gamit ko, ipod ko, lahat. May mga kanin kanin pa kumalat sa windshield namin. Everything happened so fast. Then this guy got up walked infront us again and then umupo siya dun sa center island, holding a styro with smudged blood stains on it (so from afar, akalain mo talaga na dinudugo siya). He was pointing to his elbow pero makinis siya and wala siyang bali or anything or any wound at all, the blood stains were tuyong tuyo na, props on the styro parang ganun. Traffic din nun so there was no way we could hit anybody and titilapon siya ng ganun,we were not even on the lane near the island, nasa gitna kami kaya nga kinailangan pa niyang lumakad papalapit bago nagpabangga,but there were other vehicles behind us, and if you didnt see what happened and makikita mo na lang yung tao na nakahandusay sa kalsada, hindi mo naman kaagad maiisip that its his fault and he did it on purpose so public pressure din ang naramdaman namin that moment. Ryan also saw the look on his face and dun nga niya na confirm that this old guy pulled a stunt on us. Fuck talaga. There was no dent whatsoever on the car...kinalampag lang din niya kaya tumunog na parang nabangga. Ryan went back to the car after niya super pagalitan and usisain yung manong and I even popped my head out the window to do the same thing begging the guy to never do such a thing again because you never know what his chances are next time di ba? We gave him money 'for his efforts', to which he said "kulang toh...kulang toh" And healthy na siya ulit ha. It was a hell of a night.

Pinya. Bow.

sukatero at sukatera na ang ginagamit ay mata. Maari ko bang tanungin kung tao sila o pinya? balita ko kasi maraming mata ang pinya (joke joke joke).

Often when you measure someone base on what you see, how you see, what your limited sight can cover, do you never doubt your Madam-Auring conclusions, your SOCO-evidences? Some people go about like they are true and correct in everything ..you might just start to think they have an answer to how many cc of water is the oceans,stubbornly believing everything they have not yet confirmed but is hypothetically affirmative of and without hesitation walks right onto the stage of righteousness, detailing who you might be, who you are, who you were without even knowing you. Behold. another Ripe Pinya. and you have just been disected.



Ilan ang pinya sa buhay mo? may pinya ba sa buhay mo?
O di kaya ay pinya ka?